Unexpected

My Daughter Ren and My Recipient, Al

Dos cosas, as we say around here.  1. The unexpected is not tragic, so stop worrying! But I do want to talk about it! 2. If you are a hand wringer, whiner, pearl clutcher or big fat baby about the subject of racism, please do not read further.  This is just real life and nothing to get too emotional about, but I know some of you cannot help but get hysterical if race is ever mentioned and for that I am sorry.  Stop reading!  (Maybe go watch cartoons.)

For those of you who do not know me, I feel compelled to tell you where I sit and where I stand: I am Plain White Vanilla, as you can see, by various photos of moi on the blog.  However, my ancestry is quite diverse, including people from Three Continents and Not Everyone Was a Christian nor did all of them Come Here Because They Wanted To Come Here and Some Came in Chains.  Some of them were in their wilderness and it became Mexico and then Texas.  At one point, I had living relatives that were not white. All of those folks have gone on to the other side now.  

 I do have a Chinese daughter, as you can see above, and she is my relative and she is not white, but she is not my ancestor.  My point being, though I look like an Uppity White Lady, (I am substituting Lady for The B Word, and you will see why in a minute) and I certainly have all the benefits of being UPL, I also have the benefit of having those relatives that were called all the ugly names, fled in fear, or knew the stories of those that were forced to come. I learned a lot about bigotry and prejudice from them, as they were mistreated and it did occasionally come up in their story telling. I do not recall any of them ever saying anything unkind about other people, and maybe they were just careful around little kids, especially me, since I had a big mouth and just loved to repeat things, but deep down I believe they were not bitter.  I think they were happy and grateful people, regardless of all the harsh things they faced. 

Having said all of that about my history as a member of the human race, I did not expect the subject of race to be part of this story.  But as it turns out, it is and I did not know because I did not want to see it.

The first thing I ignored, was the several times that Al mentioned that he did not expect that he would receiving a kidney from a white person.  I also noticed that Al's family, who is in and out of town, have never been around when I was around, which is not a big deal, but several times, he mentioned he wanted me to meet them and they never have been able to show up when we were visiting with him.  I have a vague recollection of them outside my hospital room but not coming in, and when I asked Al if the nurses had sent them away or what had happened, he did appear a little nervous.  And changed the subject.  Finally he said "They figured you would not want to meet them."

Al even mentioned that there had been some concern amongst the friends and family that I might be an Uppity White B Word.  I told Al, "Nothing wrong with that!" and we yucked it up and both said "I yam what I yam" in our Popeye voice....Many times it was mentioned how they speculated in dialysis about the donor.  I did not get that they were speculating about race of the donor, even though he very specifically said that they teased him that the donor might be "a rapper". He also would mention how all the Mexicans hung together during dialysis, and how there were some white people that were very rude to the Mexicans.

Finally, I got it the other day when I asked him if I could post that picture of him on my blog and Facebook and he was quite thrilled about it, and thought it would be a lot of fun, and then thought about it, for a few minutes and said, "Your friends won't like me, when they see what I look like!"  I thought he meant that his beard has grown in and he did not have in his false teeth or something, so I just told him that he did not know my friends, but they would love to see him.

A few miles down the road he said, "Your friends won't like it when they find out you donated a kidney to a spic."  Holy cccccrap! I also my drove my van off the road!

1. None of my friends use that word.

2. If they did, they know better.

3. But main point is: No one would ever, in a million years, choose not to donate due to racial differences.  I think if there was a donor that said they would only donate to another white person or person of the same race, the Transplant Coordinator Ladies would send that person packing!

Then he related how he was extremely fearful that I might cancel the whole plan, once I saw him and learned he was Native American. (Truth be told, I had been told he was by the TCL. It had all made sense to me because of my NA relatives.)  His family was pretty much convinced that I would not go through with it because of the race issue. 

However, after meeting me and hanging out with Mark, who is Pretty Much the Nicest Man in the World, while waiting for Al to go into his surgery, Al thought we might be okay with being friends with him.  He always was hopeful that we could be friends.

He said that seeing Ren and how friendly she was to him, and knowing us better, he started to think he was pretty silly for worrying about the race issue.  A real defining moment was when I told him that I had just heard that the Raiders football team name offended people because "Raiders" was another term for Native Americans.  He had replied back "Why do you think all the Natives are Raiders fans?  They like the term, but politically correct white people don't like it."  He said that my reaction, which was to accept what he said without any argument or defense of "politically correct white people" made him realize that I was "laid back about this whole race thing."

He told me he has wasted a lot of time and energy hating white people.  Who can blame the Native Americans, especially, for hating white people?  Having said that, he is right that it is a waste of time and energy to hate anyone. 

 One thing people never mention about racism (maybe because we are all so busy trying to cover up the little areas of our life where racism creeps in) is that it hurts the racist too. More than can ever be measured, because we cannot measure all the potential lost that resulted in so many good things that never could happen.

 If anyone is a racist and has not properly dealt with that hatred, then you can never fully move forward as a human being, because your spiritual life is stunted, your social life is boring, and your brain is stuck. 

I was once in a church service where the pastor asked everyone to confess to the person sitting next to them, something that they struggled with every day.  The woman next to me, looked me right in the eye and said "I hate white people."  I told her that it hurt her a lot more than it hurt me, not to mention her relationship with God.  I think that was a miracle that day, for both of us. (Honestly though, when they do "fun stuff" like that in church, I want to run away.  The pastor literally called me out from the pulpit one time when they had announced it was an all prayer service,where everyone would pray out loud with those in the pews around them.  He pointed at me and said "I just read that woman's lips:I KNEW I SHOULD HAVE STAYED IN BED.")

Being intolerant does not allow progress.  On a global level, look at who wins the Nobel prizes and the countries that Never Ever Win Because They Are Stuck.  You got it. 

Al said he keeps telling his family that all of their fears are unfounded.  He said that they believe I probably think I am better than them because I did this nice thing.  He knows that is not true, but they do not believe him.

I told him that they probably feel bad that they could not donate and that is why they take all this negativity and assign it to this donation.  It is unresolved grief.  It is okay to be sad that it did not turn out how they hoped.  I understand because I felt sad I could not donate to my friend because of all I had gone through (for nothing! is how I felt at the time) and also because my friend had to wait longer and do dialysis, and he and his wife had another month of stress, worry and sadness. It was a roller coaster, with varying speeds and heights for all the people involved.

But as it turns out, all is well that ends well.  There are happy endings all around!

Al is leaving tomorrow. We went to say good bye to Al last night.  He had a tough time saying good bye.

Today I was the one who had a tough time: When he said good bye on the phone today, he said "tell Mark and my Nieces goodbye, Sister!"

Three Stories

I have three stories, in no particular order, about what others have taught me, told me and shared with me about living organ donation.  I am not 100% certain of what the lessons are, but you will know what the lesson is for you....if there is one....

My first story happened to me before I donated.  I was walking the halls in Unnamed Police Department when a woman I did not know approached me. She explained that she had heard that I had tested to donate a kidney and that I was not able to donate to my co-worker due to antigens not being well matched, and that she had been told I was just waiting to donate to a "stranger". (Very few people knew that I was still trying to donate, so I was a little puzzled she would know.)  I told her that was true. (And did not ask her who spilled the beans to her in such great detail but I have my handful of suspects!)

  She questioned me if I knew when I would donate or what would happen and I told her that I did not know.... She then said "There is something I have to tell you!"  and she weeped; (there is a lot of crying in these stories) as she told me how she had signed up to donate to a friend and that the transplant team, which I surmised was not in Colorado, had told her right away that she was not a good match, because she had the wrong blood type.  She said they never offered her the opportunity to donate to anyone else.  I explained to her that I did not know how long the altruistic donor program existed, nor did I know if anyone would suggest it....there are different ethical considerations.

She said she had been bothered for a long time by what had happened.  I told her she might want to try again.  I asked her if she thought about calling a hospital's transplant donor coordinator, and explaining the situation, and see what happens. She just stood there with tears rolling down her face, shaking her head. She said that she did not think it would be that simple.  I did not know what to say to her, other than I think if you feel compelled to donate, you might have to make some phone calls.  She said she could not bear it if they were dismissive like the first transplant program.  Yes, you can bear it and you can make them understand, and you can make a list of all the hospitals to call....or Living Kidney Donor types of supports....but no one else can do it for you!  Sometimes the hardest thing can be to take the first step.

My next story is similar: I received a text message from a former co-worker from a job even before the Unnamed Police Department.  He texted "Is it okay for me to call you right now?"  I texted back "Y" (is that Yes or Why?) and he immediately called. After some teasing about his asking for permission to call, he said he was worried I might be "cold and mean" to him.  I told him that was and is a huge problem, with me, but I thought he could take it, and he laughed and said "I am embarrassed about what I want to talk to you about".  It seems that years ago, in another state, he had the experience where he tested for a relative and did not get chosen to be the donor, though he was able to donate in general.  He did not know why he was not chosen to be the donor.  

An interesting side note, as I kind of run around in this donation circle, I have heard of cases where someone that needs a kidney has multiple people test to donate a kidney and the donor is chosen but the transplant team does not exactly spell out why other donors were ruled out to anyone involved.  Our team did tell me why I was not chosen but they did not tell the recipient why I was not a good match. (Of course I told everyone that cared to hear about the reason I was not chosen!)  You may not have the right to know details about the recipient and the other would-be donors, but it never hurts to find out what you can about the situation so you can learn what you can and make decisions about going forward in your life. 

In that case, they did ask him if he would consider being an altruistic donor and he said that his immediate reaction was a big, emphatic NO.  But after a while, he wondered if he had made a mistake, and now, several years later, he thinks he should have donated.

He said there was no reason at all for him to hear about my donation or even that the person that told him would offer him my contact information, but he believes it happened for a reason.  He said "This is all very strange!" and he began to cry. (I am a big fat crybaby but I was dropping my jaw that he was crying!)  He said that he talked to his kids about being a living donor and none of them knew what to say.  One of his kids even said "I do not think you are humanitarian enough to donate!" (We did kind of giggle over that comment, as that particular child practically needed an Exorcist or to be Re-Programmed by the Marine Corps at one point, but has come around to be quite "nice" and "normal" now, though, the occasional Blunt Remark remains.)
 
He asked me if I thought that he was crazy?  I told him yes and no, but also told him that other people will think that he is crazy and a little weird. Part of the donation situation is that people will think you are weird.  That is okay. I am a lotta weird, as is everyone else, once you get to know them!

 "Lots of other people will need to support you if you do this now, but in the end, it's your deal...no one else can do it for you." 

  He said that when he heard I did it, he remembered how I was always so practical and sensible, and busy with a family, in his memory of our working together years, mentioning how I brought my lunch everyday, (always a sign of the down to earth) and that if I could do it, or would do it, it probably was not that difficult.  I told him that was exactly right.  You just have to keep going to the doctor, doing what you have to do, and keep thinking it will eventually happen.

"Instead of giving myself reasons why I can't, I give myself reasons why I can."

~ Unknown

My final story is about a dear friend that told me that the day of my surgery she decided to have tea at the Brown Palace and wait to hear from me when I woke up from the surgery.  (It makes me happy to think that I have some classy friends and not just friends drinking beers over at the Biker Bar, though I love those friends too.) While she was waiting, another local socialite glamour queen joined her, (because they don't work, really, see, and can hang out drinking tea at Denver's Historical Landmarks) who knows me, but not very well.  My buddy said that her friend told her that she just cannot imagine that anyone would donate to a stranger, that "the spouse" would allow it (there was even some mention of "Who Makes Dinner If Mama Donates"?) or that Laura, who is Not Exactly A Church Lady, (she quickly included that they both know I am a Christian, however) who makes a joke about everything...would do such a thing!

 (Go back and try to say this in the half clenched classy lady way..."Lovey, I cannot even imagine who would make dinner for that DARLING FAMILY if Laura was down after THAT KIND OF SURGERY!") 

Okay, they really do not talk that way(all that much)....but it is hilarious, Lovey!

  She said she explained to Classy Lady Number Two how I tested for a friend and it had not worked out and so I kept trying to be a donor. Classy Lady Number Two thought it made sense, to go ahead and donate after all those tests.

 ( Clench Teeth like Mrs. Howell: "Once they take more blood from you than a chupacabra would, and put that Contrast Through Your System, Buffy, you might as well GO ALL THE WAY and just give them that kidney that you now have Color Photos Of!") 

All right, all right, this is what she really said: "It is the most pragmatic thing in the world to give someone something they need so badly, but getting to the point of considering it, that is what is impossible for most of us."


That sums it up!  BUT it is not impossible.  It is not for everyone, or even most people, but it is not impossible, especially with the right kind of support, which is available.  We can all stand on the side of people who need our support in anything they feel they are supposed to do, whether it is run for PTO or lose weight, or switch jobs.  If there is one lesson I have learned, is that it is never okay to be a stealer of dreams or a robber of beliefs. (That is as fancy as it gets with the words around here. Relax.)  Be the kind of friend, or spouse, or mom or dad that believes in people.  Be that kind of friend to yourself.

  If you are considering donating or have a friend or relative that is considering being a living donor, remember there are plenty of naysayers.... It is a subject we do not all automatically know everything about, and it is always scary to think about surgery and medical procedures.  But not impossible! 

"Experience is not what happens to you; it is what you do with what happens to you."

~ Aldous Huxley

Thank you beautiful friends for reading my blog. I love you!

http://www.kidney.org/transplantation/livingdonors/

More Burning Questions Answered!!!

You guys crack me up because you email me these questions and call me with questions and even corner me and ask me. It is so cool!

The number one question after "How are you doing?"  (Very well, two weeks is a lot better than one week, which was not too bad) is "Did you lose any weight after you donated?"  The truth is that I did not eat as much as I normally do for one week, and not working out and so on, so I did lose some weight, but I am sure it will come back very soon. I think the kidney only weighs like half a pound, if that, so that has nothing to do with it.

The second most frequently asked question is: "Do you feel different?" with some people wanting to know exactly about volume and pressure!  No, you cannot tell you have one kidney after the surgery.  There is soreness and odd feelings in the gut (probably from being moved around and dropped on the floor during surgery ..) but my experience has been that everything regarding kidney functions feels the exact same. (No, they really don't drop your guts on the floor but it kind of feels like it for a day or two after surgery.)

Another question I get is "What would have happened if you changed your mind?"  You can change your mind, I would think, right until they put you under.  However, I think once they tell the recipient that there is a donor, it would probably be next to impossible to change your mind, conscience wise.  But if I had to change your mind at any point, I could have with no problem from the transplant team.  The other question asked is if I thought of changing my mind: the answer is no, but I was going to tell them to take them to take me out of the pool once I had a job offer, but then I asked my new job what would happen if I had the opportunity to donate and they said go for it.  Of course, I lucked out and the surgery happened before I started my job.

I also get asked if I can still drink, snowboard, fly (I never could fly, even with a broom) and so on.  People with one kidney can do most things they did before except take Advil, Motrin, Aleve and all the other drugs in that family.  That is kind of a drag, but you get used to Tylenol and the other stuff you can take.

If you play extreme sports, you should wear kidney protection, even if you have two kidneys!

A couple of people have asked me about my thoughts on donating blood, marrow, breast milk, eggs and on and on.  I would be too afraid to donate part of my liver or my lungs.  That is probably because I know next to nothing about it.  I have donated blood, been on the marrow list, donated breast milk but not eggs.  I think that it could be a great gift to someone to donate ovum but I would also think that was somehow my child running around out there.  Even as an adoptive mom who gets what a "real" parent is, I still would wonder about "my" hatchling.  I would be more likely to have donated my body to be a surrogate (I was very good at giving birth in like 20 minutes--I have Both Kinds of Kids) but only in a really perfect situation.  I think it is a personal thing to donate in these ways, and I cannot judge what is right for others or come close to saying anything other than just an opinion! 


A few people have asked me what would have happened if I did not like my recipient.  I think that can happen but I also think that having faith that you will have whatever relationship you are supposed to have, and be thankful for that person, is probably a better approach.  I feel very blessed that we do like each other and have similar views and thoughts and feelings.  My daughter Ren gave him a magnet with some sort of a blessing on it.  She told him she picked it out herself.  He said "I know that your mother would have chosen something tacky".  Absolutely!  I wanted the magnet that said "Takes One To Know One" for him.

The Legend of the Starfish

It is the custom for the founder of the Living Kidney Donors Network to send a starfish to a kidney donor.  That really made my day!

I talked to Albert on my drive home today (yes, I am driving and chatting with just one kidney) and he is doing great and out of the hospital.

Thank you for being such good friends.  Here is to finding lots of starfish and throwing them gently back into the sea.

"Once upon a time there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing.   He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work.  One day he was walking along the shore.  As he looked down the beach, he saw a human figure moving like a dancer.  He smiled to himself to think of someone who would dance to the day.  So he began to walk faster to catch up.  As he got closer, he saw that it was a young man and the young man wasn't dancing, but instead he was reaching down to the shore, picking up something and very gently throwing it into the ocean. As he got closer he called out, "Good morning! What are you doing?"  The young man paused, looked up and replied, "Throwing starfish in the ocean." "I guess I should have asked, why are you throwing starfish in the ocean?" "The sun is up, and the tide is going out, and if I don't throw them in they'll die." "But, young man, don't you realize that there are miles and miles of beach, and starfish all along it.  You can't possibly make a difference!" The young man listened politely.  Then bent down, picked  up another starfish and threw it into the sea, past the breaking waves and said, "It made a difference for that one." "

No Wimps!

We went to see Albert tonight.  He commented that since the weather has been so bad in Denver this week, hardly anyone has come to see him.  He said he was surprised we made it in the snow today.  I asked him why in the world would he think I was a wimp?  Eye roll! 

Albert has not been able to eat his favorite food (guacamole) for six years.  The doctors say he can have it now, but no one at the hospital can get it for him. His relatives keep forgetting.  It was our honor to bring over guacamole tonight and a big bag of unsalted tortilla chips since he needs to keep his diet low sodium.

He looks like he is about 20 years younger.  Despite us begging him not to, he managed to pull up his shirt and show us his scar. HUGE!  But I can tell it is healing well. 

Later he commented that all of his friends ask him about me and almost always say something along the lines that they bet I am a very nice lady (think Pollyanna-ish) and they imagine he has to be really careful what he says!  He said one sister advised him NOT to meet the donor, because obviously the donor types are not going to be happy with someone like him.

He said they are all surprised when he tells them that I was a big smart aleck...and that I did not blink an eye about swearing...

Well, hell no. 

He waited until Mark was out of the room to say that all of his friends tease him that he has to pee sitting down now. Even one of the on call physicians teased him about having a woman's kidney!

 He said he did not want to say it in front of Mark because he knew Mark was a nice guy, but he knew I would get a big kick out of it.  I told him that most "boys" with little imaginations would make that joke and we must come up with a good come back!  He said, "that is why I am telling you, lady! "

I am so glad to see him doing so well. 

I am brainstorming on that come back too.  The first one that came to mind has to do with saying "No, but I have multiple...."  Oh, NEVER mind!
"No, but I can multi task"....."No, but I am matching my shoes and belt now",
"No, but I have noticed I do not go to dialysis anymore..."

Article from Unnamed Police Department

This is the article I was telling you about! 

Crime Analyst Honors Detective With Donation!

By Danny Veith

You may recall, in the July 2010 issue of POWER, the piece I wrote concerning Detective Ed David’s need for a kidney.  In that issue I discussed Ed’s need for an O+ donor, then guessed 500 Denver PD officers must be O+. I wrote how Ed needed a donor who was not overweight,  hypertensive, diabetic, or had a family history of kidney disease (thus whittling the eligible officers down to maybe 100).  My hope was these hundred officers would contact Porter Hospital, go through the testing, and maybe 10 would be identified as near perfect matches. My dream, in that issue of POWER, involved Ed getting a kidney in addition to 9 others on the waiting list.  Wouldn’t it be great, I thought, if Ed received a kidney, got better, followed by 9 others, and all in his honor!

Upon reading my article last July, a DPD civilian, Crime Analyst Laura Altobelli, contacted Porter Hospital and began the process to donate a kidney to Ed. Laura subjected herself to blood work, an EKG, chest x-ray, and CT scan, in addition to interviews and exams by the transplant nurse coordinator, a psychologist, surgeon, nephrologist, and dietician.

The Porter Transplant Center  eventually convened a panel to identify the best donor match for Detective Ed David. Laura was not selected. Undeterred, Laura informed the transplant center she

wanted to be retained as a donor candidate.  In the weeks that followed, the center attempted to match Laura with several people on the kidney waiting list.  Then in January, Laura was informed of a match and a surgery date was set!

Laura Altobelli

So my wish for 9 people (on a kidney waiting list) receiving a kidney in honor of Detective Ed David has been reduced now to 8 because of Laura.

All my thoughts from last summer are now eclipsed by Laura’s new designation:  “Good Samaritan Donor!” Also  known as an “Altruistic Donor,” this type of donation involves giving to someone who is not so well known to you, or even a stranger.

Obviously we all need healthy kidneys to survive. Our kidneys control the amount of water in our body and filter urea and other wastes into urine. High blood pressure (hypertension) and diabetes

can lead to kidney failure. And others endure disease, such as polycystic kidney disease - or  “PKD” - as was the case with Detective Ed David.

At any given time, there are about 55,000 people on a list for a new kidney.  While waiting on the list, most end up on dialysis and about 3,000 die each year. There are about 14,000 kidney transplants performed each year. Two thirds of these transplants involve deceased (cadaver) donors; the remaining one third are from living donors.

When a person receives a kidney from a living donor, there is no waiting period (and dialysis can be avoided). Patients who receive a kidney from a living donor, without having to first begin dialysis, almost always fare better. Living donation also allows the donor and recipient to schedule surgery at a convenient time. And a kidney, from a living donor, works sooner and better, and lasts longer than a kidney from a deceased person.

With all the benefits of living donation, you can see why the majority of living donors are made up of family members and close friends. But Laura Altobelli is the exception, that is she donated to a

stranger, and that’s what makes altruistic or Good Samaritan donation so special!  There are about 1350 people in Colorado awaiting a kidney. Based on the 2010 Census, there are just over 5 million people living in Colorado. If less than 1% of our state’s population became a living donor, Colorado’s waiting list would end. If just a handful of Coloradoans followed Laura’s example, the need for suffering and being chained to a dialysis machine would be a thing of the past for our citizens enduring kidney failure.

So in Detective Ed David’s honor, and because of Laura Altobelli’s extraordinary gift, a Colorado citizen from the Grand Junction area has a new lease on life! On Monday, January 24th, Laura had a chance to briefly meet with him, followed by a telephone conversation.  Albert is 56 years old, a Native American, and served in the military during the final years of the Vietnam war. He told Laura the reality of finally receiving a kidney (to get him off of dialysis and to return to the person he was before kidney failure) is as exciting to him as when his son was born.

The surgery took place the  following day, on January 25th, and was successful.  Laura’s right kidney kicked in immediately, allowing Albert to begin his journey to health and independence.  Laura was able to go home the following day on her road to recovery.

Sadly, Laura recently accepted a job with the State, so she will not be returning to DPD. But in addition to all her positive contributions to DPD, and the friends she made here, Laura will be remembered as a Samaritan Donor!

Thanks, Laura, for honoring Ed in such a special way and being a great example to us all!

 

 

Me So Tired

Just a quick note to say that Albert is doing much better. I think he will be out of the hospital soon. He does not want to go back to the rental house, but all the way home to Grand Junction.  He is very homesick.

I have not been to see him, because the commute this week has been about three times longer than normal, so by the time I get home, its already pushing 6 or 7.  I am a tired little bunny, or would be, if I pushed much harder.

Keep praying!  He says he knows that everyone is praying for him.

Best wishes for a very happy new year!  My little Ren is a rabbit, and just had her birthday yesterday.  We had a nice celebration. 

Good, Bad and Ugly

Disclaimer: I am not a big fan of describing things as good or bad...lots of times we are too short sighted to know if something is good or bad...and I am a weirdo that thinks too much BUT there is so much going on right now!  There are certainly some things that I am hoping will change and some things I am very grateful about...

Today was my first day back at work, at a new job.  It was also below zero this morning.  I will let you in on a little secret: we do not get much below zero malarkey here in the Mile High City.  It is not the frozen tundra up here; as a matter of fact, we have over 300 sunshine days a year and our climate is High Desert.  Just because we live here does not mean we like, prepare for, or can cope with this HIDEOUS cold!

Someone had relieved my coat pockets (two coats searched) of their gloves.  I have the winning practice of placing a pair of those dollar fifty Target gloves in every coat I own, including hoodies.  Nada.  I am sure this same special someone is the person that relieved my car of its Deluxe Scraper Brush.  (To be fair, Mark had a spare one ready for me. I know I am not parking underground at my new job and will possibly need to Brush and Scrape before I can go home.) So I was crabbing about the No Gloves Situation, The Cold and Not Clear on What Hot Drink To Bring.  (No taste for coffee since the surgery, and the taste for tea is not quite back yet, either)

My car started right up (garage parked) and was On Empty.  The same special someone that may have Stolen All of My Gloves, also Still has My Debit Card Since She Needed it to Deposit/Cash her Paycheck on Saturday.  I entertained paranoid fantasies that I could not get any gas, in any fashion, due to the extreme cold and other payment options suddenly being unavailable.

I stopped to get gas (it was negative 10) and all went well. Except it was so cold that it made my coat crackle.

I arrived at work 10 minutes early.

Work was great.  Like it's a miracle kind of a great.  I still miss my old job.  Grieving that loss a little bit.

I went to the hospital to get my one week post-op labs done.  The Lab Guy, who is my buddy, and who has told me all his secrets, told me one about Albert today. He said that my recipient was struggling. I knew that Albert was going on for some more tests, but Lab Guy made it sound a lot more serious.  He said he is sure they can help him, but that Albert's body is fighting the kidney.  It is up to the transplant team to figure out the right drug combinations, and they have to keep him in the hospital to do that.  Lab Guy kept repeating that there was nothing to worry about, but it does worry me.  I cannot imagine how terrified Albert must be, even though he does not let on. 

Next, I went upstairs to see all the Transplant Coordinator Ladies (3) and all is well.  I am doing great.  I even lost 5 pounds since surgery, though I still look like I am pregnant.   The surgeon rolled his eyes at my many layers (long underwear etc) but said that my healing was going well and my scars looked great!  All of my levels in my blood and urine were just fine.  BP fine. 

One of the TCL recommended that I really think about being part of the donor movement.  I think that will happen.

I talked to an old friend from highschool on the phone.  She has a 6 month old baby girl. I miss my friend a lot and wish I could go see her, not to mention the baby.  It might be a while with my new job.

I had an email from my friends at Unnamed Police Department.  The donor for Arnold wrote an article about my donation to Albert.  That was pretty cool!  He got everything exactly right!

My family, as always, was happy to see me and full of stories. 

I called Albert, because I was worried about him and he talked a long, long time. I think he is lonely in the hospital.  His people have had to go back home and reinforcements have not arrived.  He and I found out that we both have participated in a sweat lodge with Wallace Black Elk. I do not ever talk about my sweat lodge experience, but as soon as he mentioned it, all of those memories came flooding back. He said that he wished Wallace was still around to help him, and maybe smudge his little rental house when he gets out of the hospital.  I told him that I am sure we can find someone to do that.  (I smudge my own house from time to time.)  We talked about how we were both Christians too.

Wallace Black Elk

I guess that is it.  I am posting a picture of my belly, one week post op that my 10 year old daughter took last night.  I am still very swollen, but so much better.  I hardly have any pain at all.  There are three little holes for the laporoscopic tools and the incision at the bottom for the kidney.  The red marks by the holes are where they clamped the skin, I think!  And yes, sharp eyed friends, that is a Free Bonfils shirt I have on. Bonfils has left me two messages that I missed my blood donation this time.  : )

If you are the praying kind, you know what to do.